Thursday, November 29, 2007

A Funny Story

A funny story, maybe!

Recently I held a discussion and book signing at the Hopkinton public library in Hopkinton MA. During the question-and-answer segment of our discussion, one of the participants, the only person present with MS, asked a question beginning with the statement; “I’m amazed, and excited to know that after all that you have been through, you are now remarried. How did that happen, because as you said you are worse physically today than during your first marriage? And, what changed, I mean what was the turning point that allowed you to move forward and get remarried?”

Of course, I knew exactly what she meant, because at one time I had the very same concern with which she was referring. At the point that my wife first wanted to divorce, I had an inner dialogue that went something like this: O’kay Chris, you have what is now becoming severe MS, who’s going to want to marry someone with MS? No one is going to want to marry damaged goods. I am sure that I was not the first one .to ever have this inner dialogue. It’s a real fear.

I met my then wife to be, Jane, through an online dating service and she was totally aware of my disability. After we had gone on our first date I remember asking her, why would anyone get involved with damaged goods? Why would anyone purchase a vase with a crack in the bottom? Jane’s response was “maybe, I need one to hold my dried flowers”. All she wanted was “kindness and love” no anger, just kindness and love. It helps that we both have the same goofy sense of humor. We laugh and laugh together and at one another all the time. Sure, I have slipped ups, get frustrated and angry, the difference is that I have written, re-written, read and re-read. my book so many times that when I do begin to slip-up it’s so obvious that I can’t help but catch myself. And let’s not forget, Jane has read the book so when I slip up she’s quick to point out “Chris, I think you need to revisit page 52 “and we have a good chuckle. Remember life is too short, you choose whether to smile or argue.. We were married a year later and life is fantastic. Jane is the most wonderful, loving and caring person that I had ever known. If I had listened to my inner dialogue, I would never have met my wife, Jane, the woman of my dreams. Never give up.

God bless,
Chris

Accelerated Cure Newsletter

Life Interrupted Addresses Relationship Issues and MS
Submitted by Chris Ratliff on Mon, 2007-11-19 08:02.

While a freshman at Johnson State College in Vermont, Chris Tatevosian was diagnosed with MS. He graduated in 1983 with a Bachelor of Science in Ecology and a minor in Chemistry. For seven years, he was an analytical chemical technician before becoming an occupational safety coordinator/consultant.

“My disease was relapsing remitting up until 1990,” Chris says. “That was the year I began dating the woman who would eventually become my wife. Everything was tremendous until I suffered a major exacerbation in May 1993, at which time I became disabled and unable to work. After several difficult years, we were divorced. It was one of the darkest times of my life.”

In his recently published book, Life Interrupted, It's Not All About Me, Chris shares the details of his life with MS before, during, and after his first marriage. This candid memoir examines the ways in which the author’s destructive attitude and inability to cope cost him his marriage. Chris hopes his story might help others make more of an effort to communicate effectively with their loved ones and not allow disability and low self-worth to destroy their relationships. Chris also writes about his faith in God, his experiences with bee venom therapy, and his fiancĂ©e, Jane, to whom he is now married.
Life Interrupted: It's Not All About Me, is self-published and available at booksurge.com and Amazon.com.

REFERENC LISTED BELOW:
Did you see the write up at Accelerated Cure? Click the link:

http://www.acceleratedcure.org:8080/node/2970

Sincerely Yours,Christine RatliffEditor, MSFocusThe Multiple Sclerosis Foundation 6350 N. Andrews AvenueFort Lauderdale, FL 33309954-776-6805888-MSFOCUS

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

New Book council's couples coping with the stress of chronic illness. Go to sleep when
Life Interrupted-It's Not All About Me by Chris Tatevosian guides others with chronic illness or disability to control feelings of self-pity, worthlessness and diminishing self-esteem in order to keep their relationships strong and loving. A physically debilitating illness is difficult enough, Tatevosian strives to help others avoid allowing this situation from becoming emotionally crippling as well. Open, frank and filled with invaluable advice, this is a book for anyone who wants to deal positively with illness or strengthen a relationship.Back Cover TextChronic illness can strike anyone at any time. But long illnesses don’t just affect one person, they affect the whole family. Author Chris Tatevosian was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis when he was a young man. Without realizing it, his “poor me” attitude, and difficulties with coping with the disease cost him what he felt was a marriage made in heaven. Could he have done something differently? Tatevosian shares with readers many of the destructive, relationship-busting behaviors to avoid as well as the helpful, healing ones to implement. He gives a firsthand account of multiple sclerosis, including the drugs and treatments which have been particularly beneficial for him. Stressing compassion and understanding for other family members, Tatevosian also asserts that his deep faith helped him through rocky times. By sharing his experiences, Tatevosian gives readers the awareness, knowledge and understanding they need to deal more positively with the emotional and physical stresses put on a relationship interrupted by chronic illness or disability. Warmly written and bravely told, this is a perfect book for patients, caregivers, or anyone looking to heal a relationship. “A real person, speaking right from the heart, and it touched my heart.” --Rick Mansfield, Caring Coordinator, The First Congregational Church of Hopkinton, Massachusetts.

"Life Interrupted, and It's Not All about Me " is available today on Amazon.com for $12.99

Please,visit the " Life Interrupted ,It's Not All about Me " title page on Amazon.com to share in the blog discussion to learn more about this powerful book.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Is the national multiple sclerosis society helpful or useless?

Does anyone ever feel like me, when I ask myself is the national multiple sclerosis society useless, or what?

I don't know? It just seems that every time I'm looking for support from the MS society , they deny me, an individual with MS, who is exactly who the society was designed to help, so I thought. But, they don't hesitate to ask for financial support so that they can buy wheelchairs, walkers, canes, and conditioners, etc to help us live better lives physically. Apparently, they can't see the need for mental, help guidance and support.

I was hoping that I could count on them to support my book at the annual MS conference. Hear what they had to say in an e-mail that I received from the society today.

Dear Chris,

Thank you for submitting your book, Life Interrupted: It’s Not All About Me, to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society, Central New England Chapter for review. After rigorous review by our chapter’s Clinical Advisory Committee, I regret to inform you that the chapter is unable to assist you in marketing or promoting your book.

The committee that reviewed this book is comprised of healthcare professionals, who volunteer their time in support of the chapter and people with MS. Their decision is based on the following:

§1 In most cases, it is our policy not to market or promote self-published books
§2 While everyone who has MS has a unique story to tell, it is the committee’s opinion that this narrative has a limited appeal for a broad audience
§3 Because the book endorses bee sting therapy, which is still controversial as a management technique for MS, the chapter cannot provide a forum to disseminate this information to others.
§4 The committee determined that the information listed in the book about disease modification therapies is inaccurate and incomplete, and misinforms readers about the choices and potential benefits of these treatments.

We appreciate your openness and willingness to share your personal story with others, and wish you well in your future endeavors. Coincidentally, I placed a letter to you in today's mail that also states the decision of the review committee.

Sincerely,

Linda R. Guiod, RNExec. VP, Chapter Programs and Services
National Multiple Sclerosis SocietyCentral New England Chapter101A First Avenue Suite 6 Waltham MA 02451tel + 1 781 693 5124fax +1 781 890 2089

I would love to hear your comments.

Thanks and be well,
Chris

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Wed 11/14/07 The Issue Is Prevalent

Today I received two phone calls from individuals, whom I have never met who have recently read my book. The feedback was wonderful.The first call was from Mary, who suffers from multiple sclerosis and has a four-year-old who suffers from autism. He refuses to be potty trained, so life is difficult to say the least for Mary. Her MS fatigue hits her at about 1:00 in the afternoon after she has done all the morning chores like cleaning laundry, playing with, cleaning and feeding her four-year-old son. When her husband arrives home from work he accuses her of doing nothing all day because he sees her lying down nesting. Then the verbal abuse starts and ends when they go to sleep.Just because her husband can't see the illness, he refuses to think that anything wrong with Mary. That's just horrible. She doesn't know what to do. The sad thing is, this situation is so prevalent among suffers of MS.The second call came from Susan. She actually had not started reading the book yet, she couldn't get past the cover and wanted to know who did the design. Susan suffers from severe fibromyalgia and is terribly weak and exhausted after only being awake two to three hours in the morning. She, however is married to a very understanding husband of 32 years who plans on sticking by his wife's side for better or worse in sickness and health like the wedding vows state. It's nice to know when the going get's difficult there are still loving and compassionate people out there.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Related newspaper articles

Framingham, MA Sunday October 7 2007
WRITER'S hisCORNER: Life Interrupted, It’s Not A ll About Me

Holliston resident Chris M. Tatevosian has used his personal experience to pen his new book, "Life Interrupted: It's Not All About Me." Diagnosed with multiple sclerosis at a young age, Tatevosian describes how self-destructive and negative behaviors destroyed his marriage and left him with a poor-me attitude. In writing this deeply personal account, Tatevosian says in his introduction, "my hope is that you draw from (my experiences), identify similarities and avoid making the same relationship destroying mistakes (I did)."

"Life Interrupted: It's Not All About Me," by Chris M. Tatevosian, is self-published (126 pages, $12.99) and available at Amazon.com.

From: Multiple Sclerosis Foundation Internet Newsletter [mailto:lists@msfocus.org] Sent: Friday, September 28, 2007 12:34 PMTo: Subject: MSFYI - October 2007 Issue
In This Issue:* DO YOU HAVE PRIMARY PROGRESSIVE MS? * DOES TYSABRI HAVE A REBOUND EFFECT? * MS CHAT ROOM FOR KIDS * SECOND-HAND SMOKE AND RISK OF CHILDHOOD-ONSET MS * BIKE RIDERS TRAVELING IN PENNYLSVANIA AND NEW YORK * MS HOLIDAY CARDS ARE HERE!* DACLIZUMAB SHOWS BENEFIT IN PHASE II STUDY* WANT TO TALK ABOUT SEXUAL ISSUES? * GENETICS/TRAUMA CAUSATIVE FACTORS IN MS? * TRIAL EXAMINES INCREASING VITAMIN D IN MS* WRITERS WITH MS SHARE THEIR STORIES * DVD ADDRESSES ACCESS TO MEDICAL CAREWRITERS WITH MS SHARE THEIR STORIESWhat do Janice Foster, Barbara Marchant, Don McNeal and Chris Tatevosian have in common?

They all have MS and have persevered in the face of many obstacles to self-publish their stories in order to help others cope with the ups and downs of this chronic disease. Picking Up the Pieces: Rising Above a Loss Again & Again, by Janice Foster, is the story of a woman who retired at the age of 37 due to health issues associated with MS. She writes about her illness and the death of her father to encourage others to put their life back together after a loss. Her book is available at http://www.authorhouse.com.Home Team Advantage, by Don McNeal, is a story of overcoming incredible obstacles while still maintaining a positive attitude and a sense of humor. Don played pro football with the Miami Dolphins and was named Defensive Back of the Year in 1982 and 1984. Looking back over his life, Don writes, "I realize my family was my first, most important team, and in many ways my dad was my toughest coach." His book is available at http://www.powerpublishinginc.com. Dance On chronicles the lives of three very different women who share the same diagnosis: MS. Written by Pity-Us-Not MS Support Group Leader Barbara Marchant, Dance On is available at major online booksellers. Royalties benefit MSF.Life Interrupted:

It's Not all about Me, by Chris M. Tatevosian, is a candid and humble memoir about one young man's diagnosis and how his "poor-me" attitude cost him his marriage. Chris hopes others might learn from his mistakes to communicate more effectively and not allow disability and low self-worth to destroy relationships. Chris also writes about his faith in God, his experiences with bee venom therapy, and his new wife, Jane, who he married in April of 2007.